A little compassion, part II

Censorship.  I am not for it.  Censor the blog, keep a friend.  Censor the blog, keep a friend.  Censor the blog, keep a friend.  It's been going through my head all day.

2 months ago, when I was just starting most of this journey, my Sister Lanette and I were together, I think we had just left chemotherapy classes.  We happened to be talking about God stuff--which we do a lot. I am not bragging, it's just where we go.

We were talking about a sermon she had heard about what if we prayed for people.  Like people we ran into in the store, the drive through, the grocery store.  What if we were THAT bold?

We happened to be in a McDonald's drive through at the time.

Her words really broke me.

That conversation has had me "on" since then.  I have had my eyes opened and my ears picqued.

I read a thread on facebook and I know I was in a terrible state yesterday, I've spent most of yesterday and this morning in tears.

It had nothing to do with poor customer service.  It had nothing to do with my friend not getting an order.

It was the thread.

For two main reasons:

1.  It had the "church" fighting against itself.

I have taught teens for years that we can be the ones to do Satan's work.  Without realizing it, we can give foothold, or be a instrument for his destruction.  All of us do it, I am not pointing fingers, I knowingly have done it myself.

This blog is not meant to be that instrument.

We are meant to be Jesus' hands and feet.  How much better would that world look if we walked it out like Lanette (my Sister) described?  I don't know.  I am not even sure I have the guts to do it myself.  I would never point fingers.  I just look longingly to something I just don't have, or in fact, WE don't have.

2.  I understand the girl.

I understand thinking if I screw up once more I'll get fired.  Maybe her baby daddy rejected her?  Maybe she didn't sleep because the baby was sitting on a rib all night?  Who knows the world of hurt behind her eyes.

I have in the past 2 months been in a number of situations where if I weren't more self controlled, I would have snapped the head off of someone.  (I know that I have shocked people here...yes, I have a temper...a bad one.  I have spent years developing a healthy dose of self-control.)  I have left several establishments in tears, Doctors offices, the BC Cancer Agency, the wig place at BCCA, poor customer service to blame.

I never meant for my previous post to cause trauma or for anyone to suffer from it.  I just wish I could walk in the compassion of Christ, the way He intended.  I wish that I had the guts to walk out a life that would exemplify Christ--everywhere.  Not just where it's convenient, comfortable or socially acceptable.

So, some compassion for a friend, an amendment.  Something I swore I would never do.